Giving more than you get

Some days/weeks don't you just feel like you give way more than you get? I'm not talking material things I'm talking the ungrateful children, the friends who take take take, the boyfriend that takes you for granted or the family who make you feel bad for what you haven't done instead of thinking about what you do actually do. 


THE UNGRATEFUL CHILDREN!


They have so much yet always want more...I blame this on the tv, peer pressure and the ex! I actually blame most of it on the ex. I used to buy their Christmas presents then he'd say oh thats not enough and buy more! Just as an example the last Christmas we were together the teenager had a laptop...£399 and other bits...probably amounting £600. (this embarrasses me now). He then went and bought her a pair of Ugg boots. Last year it was an I-pad plus what I'd bought her. Her expectations are now way too high. I've explained that this year I just cannot afford it and am met by 'but all my friends have XXXX or so and so gets XXXX. Yes well sorry but I'm not so and so, so its tough! I have now written down all my outgoings and incomings and given her the harsh realities of day to day living. She is now talking about getting a job!
I worry about the younger two and that they will grow up expecting all the latest things. They know that Father Christmas doesn't bring them everything on their list. However he will be visiting twice- at their dads and here. The ex has already gone WAY overboard. At the end of the day it is up to him but he is terrible with money and I don't think that this is a good lesson for them.
Anyway this year the teenager will be having £200 spent on her. The other 2 (6&4) £100. With deals I've got they actually have more like £140-£160 worth. 


THE FRIENDS WHO TAKE TAKE TAKE!


To make a long story very short- my 'friend' splits up with her boyfriend and I see her all the time. She gets back with him its like she has disappeared off the face of the earth. And so this cycle continues. I saw her 3 times last week and they weren't back together. Back together since last Friday...not a word. Grrr.....so I'm through with it. Fed up of feeling used.


BOYFRIEND TAKING ME FOR GRANTED!


This is so self explanatory really isn't it! He's a man, they don't think. He'll be told at the weekend too! Its the mood I'm in!


THE FAMILY!


My sister moaning that I'm not going  to my parents Christmas day so she won't see the children. I have never ever spent a single Christmas apart from my family and this year I've decided to. My mum  is fine with it although I'm sure she'd prefer us there she understands. We are there Boxing Day. However my sister isn't. Its like she is expecting me to change my plans so that it suits her! This incidentally is the same sister that I've been trying to get together with for weeks! 


Anyway enough of moaning! Its nearly Christmas lol! 


Do you ever feel like this? xxxx

Getting inspired!

I have no excuses to do stuff except that I am a procrastinator. I am amazing at planning but the actual doing- but nope half the time it just doesn't happen. So with this in mind I am concentrating on just doing it. Inspired by Flylady http://www.flylady.net/  I am going for the 15 minute bursts. It really is true that you can do anything for 15 minutes! 
I have also been inspired by http://www.athriftymrs.com/ and her get rid of 90 things by the end of November. I won't bore you with things I have decluttered but I am up to 37. Only took me 2 days to get rid of that as well!


Also inspired to make these but lets see if I do lol! I have loads of different buttons.

Love this idea but knowing me thats all it will be!

Good one for the kids

Really want to do this! Monogram labels. Cute!

Fab idea for cards.

 Images from http://www.marthastewart.com

So now I need to do instead of think! 

Are you a procrastinator like me?! xx

Feeling Christmassy!

I have sat down today...in fact its taken me nearly all day...and worked out what I need to buy, who for and how much I'll need for Christmas. I have been saving with Park for 2 years and its been great for me. However I had to stop paying so much as just couldn't afford it. My vouchers have now been converted into love2shop instead of a combination of Amazon and love2shop which is a right pain but i've juggled and should be on track. Can't wait to start spending!!!


Been thinking about decorating the house as want to do something different as well as the Christmas tree. 

Loving this and my friend has 'twiddly twigs' in his garden-perfect!

More sophisticated!

Really pretty & sparkly

Gorgeous, i have something similiar

Love this idea

Now i am buzzing with ideas....must stop this before bedtime!!

Night all. xx

Bedroom fantasies!!

White- how nice that would be! 

I adore decorative birdcages so this bedroom appeals lots!

Bedroom with a bath in...yes please!

I dream of old beams, rustic walls & wooden floors

So pretty!

A room for a princess.

Love the textures.

Anyway enough of the dreaming my bedroom will soon be sporting this wallpaper:

Laura Ashley Josette. Unfortunately my bedroom is probably the size of the bed...ok exaggeration but I can only fit a double bed and chest of drawers in it! Going to paint the drawers Annie Sloan Paris Grey.

Really must get on with it! Want it done by Christmas along with my million other things! 

Goodnight all. I will dream of heavenly bedrooms! xx

Love & Trust

Today my best friend phoned me very upset as her boyfriend had been sending messages to his ex. Just silly things like 'happy birthday' and 'oh sorry I missed you the other day' (when he had arrived not long after at the pub she had just left).
How does my friend know this? She checked his Facebook. I've been sitting here thinking and it points to 2 things-she doesn't trust him but he trusts her. She has all his passwords-he has given them to her. (Not sure why but irrelevant really!) Something made her decide to check up on him and she found out things that she didn't like. However if he really was trying to hide anything from her then surely these passwords would have remained secret? Also he has been split up from said ex for about 5 years although by his own admission she was his first love and he was really cut up over the split as she cheated on him. When she recently got engaged he got overly upset. Part of me wonders why he is still 'friends' with her on Facebook. To me the past is the past. I have no desire to be friends with any of my exe's. The only reason I speak to my ex is that we have children together or else I'd quite happily never set eyes on him again!! My friend now has the evil paranoia which will threaten their relationship. She has been hurt before quite badly but then haven't we all? They've only been together 6 months and she is now feeling like the bubble has burst. Me..well I just feel that its a misunderstanding that can be sorted as long as they deal with it now. 

 Trust really is the most important thing. My ex cheated on me. In fact it started 6 weeks after he proposed to me...nice hey? We'd been together nearly 9 years. You think you know a person but I never knew him at all. I found out after he cheated on me more or less the whole time. But you have to move on from what ONE person did to you. You cannot judge others by somebody else. 

My boyfriend works away during the week. Yes its hard. Bizarrely its the same situation I was in before and swore I'd never get into again! I think that if it had been the situation when I first met him I'd have probably run for the hills but it was too late when he started working away cos I'd fallen hook line and sinker! Our whole relationship is based on trust. Without it our relationship would fall apart. His ex also cheated on him as did the one before her. I will never ever be that girl. How do I know that? Because I remember the hurt and pain. I never want to be the cause of that to anyone. And also its just morally wrong. If I even felt tempted I'd have to end it. 
Anyway I guess the whole point of this is that love and trust go hand in hand you have to have both to make it work.

I love Christian Louboutin!

Is it really shallow that right now all I want in the world is one of these bags! 

Time to get more frugal/organised and being eclectic!

I have no tatoos but I love this. Think its more the saying but I do love the font too.

Do you have any tatoos? I like them but my boyfriend calls them 'slag tags'! Funny that his ex had one! (Miaow!)

So pretty I had to share.

Love this collage. All things eclectic-sums me up!

My tastes in most things are eclectic- I like such different types of music. My favourite I have to say is dance music but I adore Take That! Hey I was there the first time! I am loving Adele-she never fails to deliver. Also love Neneh Cherry-wonder what shes up to now?

 I would say my house is modern-shabby chic but I'm not sure if thats a style! I have a very modern kitchen but it has shabby chic touches eg. a unit with vintage china displayed. I also have very girly wallpaper in the kitchen but I am still undecided about this. I have a dresser in my living room that I painted in Annie Sloan and I LOVE it. It started out life as that horrid orangey pine and is now painted in her gorgeous new ochre colour. I originally done it in old white but unfortunately it looked like undercoat! It was ok as I have used that paint on a mirror frame which was black and gold. Still have loads left too. A little really does go a long way and its worth the money. Unfortunately I accidentally deleted the before pictures! So annoying.

Keeping to my all things frugal and trying not to buy new I picked this up for £2 from our local 'tip shop'. Its a bit more silver than the photo and obviously I am not keeping that picture in!

I am creating a photo wall going up my stairs (although is staying where it is) and am now on the look out for frames to do up. All the shabby chic ones i've looked at are in excess of £15- ridiculous when you consider how easy it is to do yourself. Watch this space!

Well my Flying continues at Flylady and I must say it is really paying off. I feel I can actually relax a bit. Got rid of so much paper its untrue! I have friends coming for lunch on Friday and instead of rushing around tomorrow blitzing its only going to take me an hour tops to get straight.

My aim now is to keep this organisation up. I have many ongoing projects and so my goal now is to finish these by Christmas.

They include:

Finish painting table and chairs

Fill holes in on dresser to complete it

Paint living room

Paint & paper my bedroom & paint my drawers

Various jobs in kitchen

Anyway time to put the little Lovely's to bed. Aaah peace at last! xx

Happiness.....

Is knowing my children are happy, safe and truly loved. xxx

Biology does not make you a father...

Rant rant rant time!!I am really upset and more than that VERY angry! Brief history-split with ex nearly year and half ago. 2 kids with him. Its not been easy but then nor was our relationship! (9years).

Anyway so Wednesday he loves me wants me back blah blah blah. Not interested and told him as much. Turns out he's fallen out with his girlfriend (same one he cheated on me with!) He slashed her tyres (yes really!) smashed up his own tv and all because she is a bit paranoid...hmm wonder why!!
Well thats by the by because he was meant to have our children this weekend and apparently can't as he has to sort things out with her. Now on Weds he told me she'd gone back to her home town but suddenly today she is somewhere else. Doesn't really matter where she is as the point is to me that surely NOTHING should be more important than seeing them??? This has been going on for days so why does it have to be apparently sorted out when he is meant to have them? Also after talking to his mum(who him and his gf live with) she seemed to think he was out with his friend and wasn't supposed to be having children?? Sorry if this is confusing!!
So where do I go from here? This is just something in a very long line of stuff. The children are understandable upset and I am sick of making excuses. Its having an effect on everyones lives and I am at my wits ends.

Life is as easy as you make it and he is making mine very difficult.xx

Things i am loving!

                                                   Love them both so much.....bank balance says no to either!

                                                        I'm dreaming of a really warm cosy knitted throw.

                                                                  This is my all-time favourite bedroom! 

           Just bought some Moet for a birthday (between my siblings and myself so not too much each!)

                                                                                    Vampy sexy red nails!

                                                                                             Coloured glass

                                               Burlesque dancer- shall I dress up as one for Halloween! Love it!

                                                                                Always my drink of choice!

Organisation and de-cluttering plus a confession or 2!

I have just looked and my e-mails and one has come from Cox & Cox saying the perfect time to organise. I am very tempted by this:

Perfect for my youngest daughter who always has about 10 books in bed so that she can put them nicely next to her bed instead! Only £12.50 as well.

Adore this but at £115 this will remain a pipe dream! 

However will now keep a look out for something similar.

This month as per Flylady I am concentrating on paper clutter. I do seem to have tonnes of it. So am concentrating on area by area. I have started by sorting out all bits that I've cut out of magazines and making  (sort of!) mood boards. Here are a couple of examples:

Christmas Wrapping ideas- but I doubt any kids would appreciate this button snowman!

Christmas wrapping ideas- lace and buttons- my sister,cousin & mum would appreciate this.

Sorry photos not great but love this. I am currently painting my chairs and 2 are pink! 2 are cream!

What I love about this is the photos on the string on the wall

Just love these boxes!!

Now here are my confessions:

I owe over £1000 not sure of exact amount but will be working this out asap. I plan to start 2012 without this. If I buckle down I reckon I can do it. Nobody knows so this is like confession!

I sold my £1600 engagement ring for £400 and I tell you what I enjoyed every penny of that money! Naughty but I figured I never paid for it! I don't want a reminder of it so it was win win!

I had a McDonalds even though I'm doing Weight Watchers!

Sometimes I clean my bathroom with baby wipes!

I'm addicted to other peoples Blogs and reading about their lives- equally I think I am addicted to MoneySavingExpert!

I tell my people I've done stuff even when I haven't then have to rush around making sure its done! Surely I should have grown out of this by now!

I drink too much when my children aren't here and stay up really late. I then spend the next few days moaning about how tired I am but don't admit why!

So what are your confessions? Mine are a bit boring really!

Early to bed . Goodnight all. xx

Diaries 2012 and other thoughts!

So coveting this for next year! 
http://images.amazon.com/images/G/01/richmedia/images/cover.gif


But torn between this also. Not as pretty but really works for me. Don't have the filofax one at the moment but do have a Dodo pad. I have to have something that has space for all 4 of us plus bills so 5 boxes across is perfect.

I am naturally unorganised but I do wonder if I'd be the same if  I didn't have kids? I had my eldest daughter really young so have never lived alone and only had myself to think about. I am also not naturally tidy although when it was just the 2 of us things were a lot tidier than they are now! 3 kids and a 3 bedroom house make for much mess! Add my boyfriends daughter every other weekend and all order goes out the window! Well what order there was. 

My mum is constantly on to me about routine and how we don't have enough. Don't get me wrong we have a good routine regarding the 2 little ones bedtime but I'm one of those people who leave things til the last minute, most of the time don't make the beds in the morning and don't have set days for things like washing etc. However I always always meal plan. Both for time and financially. I batch cook a lot. If you asked me where any document was I could immediately put my hand on it. Financially I am way more disorganised than I'd like to be but I am working on all these things. Its definitely baby steps. I am going to make some confessions but perhaps I'll leave that until tomorrow!! Until then bye bye!

Indian summer?

Why is it that when the children go back to school it decides to shine about 2/3 weeks later? And probably come the weekend it will rain!  Well my washing on the line and I'll do that for as long as possible!
I am really tired lately. There are so many things I want to do but I find that I never get around to them. Personally I reckon I've just got a bit lazy and need to just go for it. The less I do the less I want to do so I'm now snapping out of it! 
I have/am going to:


Joined Weight Watchers again. Need to lose 2 stone..eeek! 


I'm going to write a list of everything that needs doing in each room and make a start. But instead of starting one thing, not finishing, then moving onto the next and repeating the whole cycle and actually ending up in a worse state I am going to be methodical. I am such a procrastinator and there is no excuse. Procrastinating is actually a complete waste of time in itself. Instead of thinking I will do! Check this poem out that I was given yesterday! Love it!
http://www.quantumenterprises.co.uk/roundtuit/traditional_round_tuits.htm

Decided to stop being unrealistic. I am never and nor do I want to have a show home. What I have is actually pretty good and I need to remember that. This is the look I love! 

Make a lot more quality time with my children. It seems the weekend is blink and you miss it. I then think 'what have we actually done?' So Sundays are becoming all about being together. 


Start to seriously decide what career/job path I am going to take. I am a qualified Beauty Therapist but don't want to work in a salon for various reasons. Thinking of mobile but not sure in the current financial climate if this is viable? Then I wonder should I just get an admin type job until the kids are older? 

Cutting down my drinking! I've lived a bit on the wild side lately and although I am not going to stop socialising I am cutting down on the vino. My kids go to their dad's every other weekend and I think I've been making up for the lost years I spent with him!!!


Ok I'm off to make lists and be a Flylady!